


Fun Is Had By All

by tinytefffers



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-17
Updated: 2015-08-26
Packaged: 2018-04-09 18:15:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4359275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinytefffers/pseuds/tinytefffers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things are changing in the Holmes-Watson household but not everything is to be taken seriously as we get a look into their new lives. (I'm horrible at summaries so I apologize)</p>
<p>P.S. It is perfectly normal for both men and women to get pregnant in my little universe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Calendar

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everybody! So this is a new, and exciting, thing for me! I normally don't write for the 'Sherlock' fandom but have just recently started watching the show and have gotten addicted to anything 'Sherlock' SOOO with that said here is my first attempt at this
> 
> Oh and also I am American so the traditional English language and English slang isn't my strong suite. I strongly apologize for not getting some things right. I've tried hard to learn from the show and other stories. Well here we go...

 

 

The Calendar

 

“One…two…three…” Sherlock Holmes counted the weeks on the calendar his stomach beginning to churn the farther he got in his counting. “Four…five…” he groaned and rubbed at his face with his hands. “Five…blood fucking five.” He shook his head and counted again…and again…and again until he couldn’t count anymore because quite frankly he had tears falling down his cheeks. “Not five…not four…God damn-it three would be bad.” He glanced at his watch and realized John would be coming home from surgery soon. Clearing his throat he tried to compose himself before his flat-mate and boyfriend joined him for the evening. “Right…get it together Sherlock, you’ll figure this out.”

“Figure what out?”

“Jesus Christ John!” Sherlock exclaimed almost literally jumping out of his skin. He had been so deep in thought about John coming home and composing himself the he had actually missed said man coming home.

John stood there his eyes wide, what kind of a reaction was that? Definitely not one of Sherlock Holmes. “Sherlock?”

Shaking himself out of his shock Sherlock shook his head. “Nothing…I’m fine.” He answered the question he knew the doctor was going to ask next. “

“Right and I’m the Queen.”

“You are a queen.” Sherlock said with his best smirk and stomped out of the sitting room to go use the loo. He swore he was using the darn bathroom every five minutes.

“Ha Ha!” John called after him before going into the kitchen to find something to eat. Of course when he opened the refrigerator he wasn’t surprised to find some sort of severed body part. This time though it wasn’t a body part of a human but of…was that a dog’s…? “Sherlock!”

Sherlock was coming out of the bathroom when he heard his name being called. “Must have found it.” He walked into the kitchen and smirked at the disgusted look on John’s face as he closed the door of the refrigerator.

“Why is there a dog’s…penis…in our refrigerator?” John asked actually blushing when saying ‘that’ word.

“Fido.”

“Excuse me?”

“The dog’s name is Fido and his penis is in our refrigerator to stay cold.” Sherlock explained like that made complete sense when John thought it made anything BUT complete sense.

“So we are keeping dog…members…in our refrigerator because they need to stay cold.” John said not sure why he was even asking for clarification. “Any reason it’s not in the freezer?”

“Yes.”

“Oh?”

“It’s testicles are in there.”

 

<><><><><><><> Sherlock was actually thankful for the crazy conversation for dog private parts because it caused him to forget about why the calendar was off the wall and sitting on the counter top. But the moment John mentioned it his furious counting and crying spell came flooding back to him.

“I was trying to remember the date of a case.” Sherlock lied through his teeth, something even HE wasn’t very good at.

John was confused, but that wasn’t abnormal. “You don’t keep track on the Kitty Calendar…your case stuff I mean.” He said still wondering why in the world they had a calendar full of kitty cats in the first place.

Caught off guard about what to say Sherlock actually stumbled around his words. “I…I did this time, special case…very special about…about.”

“Cats?”

“Right yes!” Sherlock was so excited on the inside to have come up for a reason for his yammering. “That case about Mrs. Jasper’s cat.”

“Which was a complete bore.” John added. Even he had thought the case of the missing five footed cat was boring and quite frankly down right weird.

“Yes, right.” Sherlock decided to hang up the calendar but before he did he gave it a nice long stare and a good added glare that to his horror didn’t go unnoticed by John.

“Sherlock you are behaving strangely are you sure you are okay?”

Sherlock looked at the calendar and then glanced quickly at his stomach another thing that did not go unnoticed but the doctor but thankfully in another way.

“That’s right I was getting a bite to eat when I found that…that…thing.” John said as he got out the fixings for a sandwich. “Want anything.”

They could talk all day about dog parts where there was food but the mention of the food had Sherlock running towards the bathroom at breakneck speed.

“Sherlock?” John called through a mouthful of his sandwich. He then put the food down and dashed after his boyfriend. He found him in the bathroom off of the now ‘master’ bedroom…their bedroom now that they actually were sharing a room much to Mrs. Hudson’s delight. “Oh Sherlock.” He said gently as he got him a wet towel and a glass of water for when he was fished.

Meanwhile Sherlock was busy heaving everything he had eaten that day, which hadn’t been much, into the toilet bowl, his hands gripping the sides leaving marks. He was getting so violently ill that he had tears running down his cheeks mixing with the sweat from his brow.

John rubbed Sherlock’s back until the other man was finished getting sick. He reached up and flushed the sick away before helping Sherlock to sit back against the bathtub and just taking some much needed breaths of air. “Here sip this…slowly.”

Sherlock took the glass and took a few much needed sips of the cool liquid. He wasn’t going to tell John this was the third time he had done this that day. One because he knew his boyfriend would be worried well…as a boyfriend…and two he would be worried as a doctor. Right now Sherlock didn’t want either worried man in this bathroom so he didn’t mention it.

“That was slightly peculiar.” John said as he helped Sherlock to his feet. “I don’t think I have EVER seen you sick before…let alone vomiting.”

“There was that time…” Sherlock tried.

John shook his head in the negative, “There was no time…and now I feel like you are trying to hide this…how I am not sure but what are you hiding Sherlock?”

“Nothing at all.” Sherlock replied as he walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Feeling sick all over he decided to change into his pajama pants and robe which of course meant he went barefoot as well. When he finished dressing he realized that John had left the room. He found it odd that the other man had dismissed their slight argument so quickly but didn’t say anything about it as he padded his way back downstairs to find John again eating his sandwich.

<><><><><><> “I don’t like you hiding things from me.”

Sherlock glanced over at John in bed. They were both on their laptops doing various things but had been having an okay discussion about a Shakespearian play they saw earlier in the week when John decided to bring THIS up.

“I don’t know why you keep thinking I am withholding information from you when I am not.”

John sighed and put his laptop on the night stand by his side of the bed. “The kitty calendar.”

Sherlock put his own computer down rather forcefully. “Would you give it a rest about the bloody calendar?”

John smirked.

Sherlock frowned.

“Something IS going on about that Calendar” John said excitedly, he always loved when he figured something new out. “So you are looking something up.”

“I told you it has to do with that case about the cat.”

“And the dog…parts…”

Sherlock rolled his eyes, “That has to do with something different entirely.”

“Sherlock you know I love you and you know that you can be honest with me.” John said reaching over and taking his boyfriend’s hand.

“I know this.”

“Then why are you NOT being honest with me. You are keeping weird animal parts, calculating things on a cute animal calendars, vomiting like I wouldn’t believe so you have to be bloody lying to me about something.” John exclaimed actually hopping out of bed and pacing around, much like Sherlock would do.

Sherlock sat in bed with wide eyes. He was quiet for a second before replying. “Why do all those things lead you to believe I am lying to you?”

“Because they are out of character for you!”

“Oh.”

John stopped his pacing to look at Sherlock “Oh? That is all you have to say?”

“Yes.” Sherlock got out of bed himself and headed for the bathroom.

“Going to vomit again?” John questioned as he followed after his boyfriend only to find him standing in front of the toilet urinating. “Oh.”

“Care to stare?”

John quickly turned and walked back out of the room.

<><><><><><><> 

Neither of the men were up to sex that night or the next morning for that matter. Instead both men ate breakfast in silence and John headed off for the surgery, the only thing was Sherlock decided to spring his secret on the young doctor as he was walking out the door.

“Could you be oh so kind and pick me up something from the shops on your way home.” Sherlock questioned, causing John to stop on the steps.

Sighing, John walked back up the steps and into the house. “Please be quick I am running late.”

“Sure.” Sherlock said.

John looked at the other man expectantly. “Yes…what is it?”

“A pregnancy test.”

This caught John completely off guard, so much so that he almost fell to the floor since he had been leaning on the back of the chair. “Excuse me.”

“I have decided after some deduction that I require a pregnancy test.”

John moved so he was sitting IN the chair and looked at Sherlock like he had gone completely insane. “YOU need a pregnancy test. What for a case? And if so why can you not go pick it up yourself?”

Sherlock sighed and shook his head, he couldn’t believe how dense his boyfriend could be at times. “John the pregnancy test is for me. My period is five weeks late.”

John must have been swallowing some siliva because he started choking. When he finally was able to talk he looked at Sherlock in shock. “YOU…Sherlock Holmes went five weeks without a period without telling me without getting a bloody test?”

“Yes.”

John threw his hands up in the air, “Well there is no way in hell I am going to work this morning without getting you your test. Actually no I am not going to get a test.”

“John I know you are mad at me but it would really help…”

John shook his head, “No you Git I am taking you WITH me to surgery and we’ll do a test there.”

Sherlock shook his head like crazy, “Oh no….this is a private thing.”

John rolled his eyes, “I don’t plan on inviting anybody else to join us in the examination room.”

“Oh.”

“Yes oh.”

“John?”

“Hmm?”

“I love you.”

<><><><><><> 

“Now that I think about it I could have done this on my own at home.” Sherlock said as he sat on the examination table with his shirt thrown over the back of a chair. He felt exposed sitting there without his clothing even though it was only John in the room who had seen him in far less clothing.

“Hush.” John said as he got a needle ready so he could take the blood he needed for the pregnancy test. He had debated on if he should do a urine test or a blood test and had decided to do both. This of course frustrated Sherlock.

“Must I really urinate in the small cup?”

“Would you rather urinate in a big cup because that could be arranged?”

Sherlock rolled his eyes as he took the cup and went and did his business in the bathroom off to the side of the examination room. He blushed when he brought back the almost full cup.

John actually chuckled for the first time since Sherlock’s admission and found that he was beginning to be okay with the idea. It wasn’t that he never wanted to be a father, actually it was the opposite. It had been Sherlock that he decided for both of them that they were not going to be parents. But here they were at his surgery just about to do various tests for pregnancy.

“John?”

It was then John realized he had been spacing out and quickly shook his head to clear the cobwebs and return to the land of the living and his possibly pregnant boyfriend. “Yes…sorry.”

“Can I put my shirt back on?”

John shook his head, “No...if these tests come back positive then we will do a sonogram.”

“I didn’t agree to that.” Sherlock said shaking his head. “I just want to go home after this.”

“Tough.”

Sherlock sighed and crossed his arms over his bare chest and waited impatiently for the tests to be completed.

It took a good half an hour for the blood results but the second John saw the results his eyes went wide and a huge smile came over his mouth. “Well it’s certain.”

“It is?”

John nodded grinning like a nutter. “You’re pregnant Sherlock.”

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Baby Pictures, A Chinchilla and the Bloody Cow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am completely awful when it comes to writing cases so that is why these will come off as completely ridiculous...totally apologize if you were looking for a fic with great cases but this is more about Sherlock and John and the fun I am having with them *evil laugh*.
> 
> Please enjoy :) 
> 
> P.S. Thank you for those who left reviews and Kudos for the last chapter!!!

 

 

 

 

 

Sherlock lay on his back on the examination table his eyes wide as he looked at the sonogram screen. “That’s a baby.” He stated rather stupidly…something Sherlock Holmes was not.

John smiled as he moved the attached wand over Sherlock’s stomach. “Listen to this.” He said as he flipped a switch and soon a swooshing sound could be heard through-out the room. “Hear that?”

“Of course I do.” Sherlock said and listened in awe. “I’m also not going to be one of those silly parents that asks about it being so fast because I know that a fetes’ heartrate is supposed to be the rate that it is currently going.

“Right.”

Sherlock was a big shocked by the lack of words his boyfriend was using. “Everything alright?” he meant with the baby but assumed he could be asking John too.

John looked from the monitor and to Sherlock. “Oh yes everything is fine.” He patted his boyfriend on the leg in reassurance. “Do you want a picture?”

“An actual picture?”

John nodded his head.

Sherlock smiled a little, “That would be nice.” He said as he wiped off his stomach with the towel John handed to him and then sat up on the table. “So he or she is okay.”

“Of course,” John said smiling. “I would have said if something was wrong.”

“Right.”

“So you appear to be about six weeks along.” John said smiling like a fool; he was enjoying this immensely.

“Hmm”

John looked at Sherlock…really looked at him. He couldn’t believe it but the detective appeared to actually be enjoying the idea of being pregnant. Hadn’t they had a conversation about this only a few months earlier?

 

***THREE MONTHS EALRIER ***

 

“Sherlock you would enjoy it.”

“I assure you I would not.” Sherlock stated from where he was seated at his microscope at the kitchen counter.

“But they are cute and cuddly…”

Sherlock looked over at John, his eyes giving him a dubious look. “A child is NOT cute and cuddly, John.”

“Well maybe not so cuddly…not all the time…but they are cute.” The doctor said a cute pout coming onto his face one that often led them to the bedroom…and maybe that was John’s point here.

“You honestly have NO idea what you are speaking of.” Sherlock said as he went back to looking at the experiment under the microscope all the while thinking of what John had been suggesting. John wanted children and if that was the case and they had children of their own it meant Sherlock would have to become pregnant. This was honestly the part that the young detective was not excited about. Could he really handle being pregnant?

“You’re being selfish…once again.” John said after a second of silence. “I don’t understand why you don’t want to have children with me.”

“Because I don’t.”

 

***BACK TO REAL TIME***

 

“Sherlock we need to talk.” John said as they gathered their things and headed out of the surgery.

“About?”

John was beginning to feel rather exasperated by his boyfriend, he didn’t understand his behavior and attitude around their newfound information. “Sherlock!”

Hearing the change in tone in John’s voice had Sherlock’s attention. He turned to look at him with his own look of exasperation. “Can this not wait until we get home?”

‘Right he’s embarrassed’ John thought to himself but nodded to Sherlock. They got a cab and took it home in silence. Both men needing time to think things through…but both were thinking on the same topic.

<><><><><><>

Lunch was attempted when they arrived at the flat. Well it was successful on John’s part but completely unsuccessful on Sherlock’s.

“Sherlock!” John exclaimed knocking on the bathroom door.

“How do you…expect me to bloody open the door.” Sherlock managed to say through bouts of heaving.

“Good point.” John mumbled to himself as he stood on the other side of the bathroom door waiting for Sherlock to be finished getting sick.

It took a good few minutes but soon the detective was opening the bathroom door looking as white as a sheet. “Jesus Sherlock.”

Sherlock just glared as he pushed past his boyfriend and flopped onto the bed his head going in his hands. “This is not going to work.”

John began getting worried, “What isn’t.”

“This vomiting all the time, I won’t be able to work like this.”

“It should stop in a few weeks.” John said as he sat down on the bed next to Sherlock and started rubbing his back. He was rather shocked with the other man leaned into his touch when normally he would push him away.

Sherlock looked at John in disbelief. “You say that like it’s a good thing…well you try being violently I’ll numerous times a day.”

“I would rather not.” John admitted sympathetically. “But seriously Sherlock can we REALLY talk about this now?”

“Not sure what to say…you ‘knocked’ me up.” Sherlock said with a slight smirk on his lips. “You really were a bad, bad boy.”

John had NO idea where the suggestive comments were coming from but quite frankly he felt proud for ‘knocking’ up Sherlock…not that it took much effort obviously because they sure as heck hadn’t been trying. Realizing Sherlock was expecting an answer or comment or something he did. “I don’t see it as being bad. We’re in a committed relationship, we just happened to have sex and bingo.”

Sherlock was shaking his head still smirking. “Don’t you remember what happened seven weeks ago?”

John looked confused at first but then remembered, blushing bright red. “The chinchilla.”

“The chinchilla.”

“I swear that little guy just did something to me.”

Sherlock’s smirk turned to a disgusted face. “Ew John you make it sound like it was the chinchilla that turned you on and got me pregnant.”

Thinking of it that way had John making a face too. “Okay so it wasn’t the chinchilla itself but the case of the chinchilla.”

“What is with us having animal related cases recently? First the chinchilla and then the five footed cat.”

“No idea.”

Sherlock got a contemplated look on his face but shook out of his thoughts rather quickly. “But seriously it was the OWNER of the chinchilla that you ready to get your rocks off.”

John sat up straighter, “He was as hot as hell and you know it too.”

“I wouldn’t say that…”

“Yes you would.”

“You know when you talked about wanting something cute and cuddly a few weeks ago we should have bought a chinchilla.” Sherlock said. “Would require less vomiting on my part.”

John sighed and started rubbing his boyfriend’s back again. “I’m sorry.”

Sherlock was taking off guard by the apology. “What?”

“I know you didn’t want this.”

Sherlock sighed, “John…” he paused and looked at his lap. “Not your fault you know.”

“Technically it is.”

Sherlock shook his head this time looking up and over at John. “It kind of takes two people to make a baby. I was not innocent in that chinchilla debacle.”

Hearing this caused John to laugh. “So you admit it had to do with chinchilla guy.”

“Is that what we are calling him?”

“Might as well.”

“Hmmm.”

“So we’re having a baby?” John questioned, ready to spew many words of protest if Sherlock mentioned anything about terminating the pregnancy.

Sherlock surprisingly wasn’t thinking about anything to do with termination. Actually his mind was on vomiting…not at that exact moment but in the future. Realizing he should probably answer John’s question he nodded his head, “We’re having a baby.”

<><><><><><>

“Another one?”

“Yes?”

“Cow this time?”

“Bull actually.”

John ran a frustrated hand over his face as he looked at the pictures all over the sitting room of the flat. “This is positively revolting.” He made a face. “Tell me again why we are focused on a cow’s…murder?”

“It is not the fact the cow was killed but how it was killed.”

“Riiight…”

Sherlock sighed as he filled in his boyfriend, flat-mate and work partner on their most recent case. Mrs. Harper had found her husband murdered the same way the family cow was killed the night before. Even though it was a connection between a barnyard creature and a human being rather than the normal human, human connection Lastrade thought it was good to bring Sherlock in on the case. The only problem was he didn’t realize how the various images would affect his friend.

“Why do we keep getting animal cases?” John questioned as he again looked at the ghastly images all around the room.

“Don’t know.” Sherlock said sounding distracted.

John caught on and looked over at what the other man was looking at. It was simply another one of the disgusting cow pictures. “What is so impressive about that one?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

Sherlock nodded, “yes nothing.” But as he said this he turned positively green.

“Sherlock?”

“Bin!” Sherlock practically screamed and was thankful that even though he was confused John grabbed the waist bin by his chair and scooted it in Sherlock’s direction.

“What is going on?” Lestrade questioned as he walked in the flat just in time to see Sherlock grab the bin and start violently vomiting into it. “Weak stomach all of a sudden Sherlock.” He teased not realizing how truthful that was.

“Greg…” John warned since Sherlock was glaring at the older man even in midst of being sick.

“It is normal for him to do that and I just haven’t noticed?” Greg questioned not listening to John’s warning.

Sherlock heaved

“Seriously Man, stop it.” John said as he walked over and rubbed at Sherlock’s back trying to get the heaving under control.

“Right.” Greg cleared his throat and headed for the kitchen, the tap could be heard turning on so John figured he was getting a glass of water for Sherlock, at least that would be nice.

Finally, after a good five minutes of being sick, Sherlock slumped back in his chair, sweating, tears running down his face. He was a good mess and when he heard commotion in the kitchen realized again they weren’t alone. “Lovely.” He mumbled to himself.

“It’ll be fine Honey.” John said to the other man still rubbing his back.

When Greg came back into the room John used that opportunity to head upstairs and dispose of the sick in the bin.

Greg did come with water and quickly handed into Sherlock, a bit flustered.

Sherlock mumbled a ‘thank you’ as he took the water and sipped at it for a few minutes.

“Have you two not said anything to each other the whole time I’ve been gone?” John questioned as he came down the stairs.

“I said ‘thank you’ for the water.” Sherlock said with a shrug.

“Which is strange.” Greg pointed out. “So what is going on? First vomiting over crime scene photos now being polite?”

Sherlock sighed and looked at John who looked back at him in encouragement. “Oh for goodness sake.” He said throwing his hands up in the air, thankfully the glass had been put down at some point. “I’m blood pregnant.”

Greg’s eyes went wide and he had to flop down in a chair to keep from falling over. “Excuse…me?”

“You heard me.”

John rolled his eyes at his almost functionally mute boyfriend. “He is pregnant, we found out yesterday.”

“And you are letting him go gallivanting after dead cows?”

“That might change after this reaction.” John said looking at Sherlock who was glaring at him.

“It had nothing to do with the images on the paper.” Sherlock said actually pouting a little.

“Oh?” John found this interesting. “Do enlighten us.”

Sherlock sighed, “The photos smell funny.”

“Funny?”

“Yes odd…peculiar”

John rolled his eyes, “I know what ‘funny’ means Sherlock.”

“Then stop asking ridiculous questions.” Sherlock said as he wiggled around in his chair, nothing felt comfortable anymore and he hated it when even his favorite chair was not how he wanted it.

“How does the photographs smell funny, Sherlock?” Greg questioned interested.

“Where did you get them from?” Sherlock asked, not answering Greg’s question.

Greg was confused to get a question thrown back at him without the answer to his. Sighing he went for it. “Mrs. Harper.”

“Thought so.”

“You did?” John asked seriously not understanding how his boyfriend’s brain worked sometimes. “How did you come of that result?”

“Smells of men’s cologne.”

“Huh?” Both John and Greg said at the same time.

“Sherlock you are REALLY not making sense.” Greg said shaking his head in disbelief. “Please clarify.”

Sherlock was getting exasperated. “It’s obvious she is having an affair and her husband found out about it and got himself killed in the process.”

“And the cow?”

“Sadistic freaks.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I love reviews...thrive off of them actually so please try and take some time to do so. You guys are all great


	3. Long Discussions & Ex Wives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off thank ALL of you who have left reviews and kudos they mean so much to me!
> 
> This story of course is semi-AU but I am trying to fit with cannon at least a little bit. This chapter might seem a bit off because I am still currently watching the Sherlock episodes and this chapter was written after the beginning (damn having to pause it to do homework!) of Season 3 episode 1 and through the end of episode 2. SOOO if things seem weird like characters are off and mentioned off kilter I apologize and just remind you that I have Sherlock pregnant so that is just odd anyway HAHA!
> 
> ANYWAYS I hope you enjoy this once again slightly odd story!!!

Long Discussions & Ex Wives

 

“I’m horny.”

John paused in looking at the paper his eyebrow lifting. “Excuse me?”

“I’m horny.” Sherlock stated again from where he was lounging on the couch in only his pajama pants a t-shirt, surprisingly his normal robe was missing from his attire.

John put the paper down so he could look at Sherlock. “You don’t look it.”

Sherlock turned his head to the side to eye his doctor. “How does one LOOK horny?”

“Tented pajama bottoms would be a sign.” The doctor smirked causing Sherlock to roll his eyes.

“I said I was horny not aroused.”

John shrugged his shoulders, “There are things that can be done about that.”

“No.”

“No?”

Sherlock nodded, “I am not having sex while our son or daughter is inside of me.”

This caused John to bust up laughing, “You simply cannot be one of those people who think the kids can feel or hear their parents having sex while in the womb.”

“Of course not.”

“Then what is the problem?”

“I’m ugly.” Sherlock mumbled, looking down at a hole he found on his pajama bottoms.

John heard Sherlock and was beyond shocked at his boyfriend’s admission. “Sherlock…you know that is not true. Plus you don’t even look pregnant.”

“I do.” Sherlock said rubbing his still sculpted flat stomach.

John sighed and got up. He moved Sherlock’s legs so he could sit down on the couch. He held his boyfriend’s legs in his lap gently. “You are not ugly nor do you look pregnant…and I find you quite sexy.”

Sherlock looked at John dubiously. “I have never been sexy.”

“Oh yes you have…are…”

Sherlock smirked at John, “Nice save.”

“Oh ha.” John said rolling his eyes. “But seriously Sherlock you tell me point blank that you’re horny. Did you just want me to simply know or do you want me to do something about it?” as he said this he started to run his hand under Sherlock’s pant leg, rubbing his ankle.

Sherlock couldn’t help but shiver at the feeling of John’s hands on his skin. “I simply thought you should know what my body is doing…just in case something is wrong.”

“There is nothing wrong with being horny.” John assured his partner. “Actually it is perfectly normal for your hormones to be exacerbated during the first trimester.”

“Really?” Sherlock asked actually sounding relieved. Even though he and John had been a couple for a year or so now Sherlock had still been rather aloof when it came to romance and sex. It was almost like the other man’s mind was so large and working over-time that it couldn’t process simple body functions like sleep and sex.

“I kissed her.”

John was completely taken aback and looked at Sherlock like he had five hundred heads (the normal 3 was not enough). “What???”

“Molly.”

“You…kissed…Molly.” John said the weird sounding words and was still looking at his boyfriend like he was a complete fruit cake.  

Sherlock nodded his head, “After IT happened.”

John knew automatically what ‘IT’ was and felt his heart hurt just thinking about the time he did not have his boyfriend, or at that time simply his friend.

“So you didn’t even tell me you were alive but you KISSED Molly?”

“Pretty much.”

John felt sick to his stomach. “Why?”

“She was there…and I was there.”

“You are not making sense.” John said throwing his hands up in exasperation.

Sherlock was quiet for a second before shaking his head. “Forget it.”

“Why tell me this Sherlock? Did you want me jealous because it worked? You rarely kiss ME and we’re together.” John said feeling the urge to get up and move away from the other man but he didn’t want to be childish.

“It meant nothing, I literally just grabbed her as I came breaking into the window.”

John looked at Sherlock, “You actually did that? I thought it was a tall tale.”

Sherlock actually laughed, ‘No…happened.”

“Okay so you broke through a window and kissed our slightly awkward pathologist.”

“Pretty much.”

“Pretty much?” John raised an eyebrow. “What else Sherlock?”

“I sort of almost had sex with her too.”

This caused John to start coughing on his own saliva and caused Sherlock to have to pound him on the back to gain his breath back.

“You…Sherlock homes…almost had sex with some woman?” John said in complete disbelief.

Sherlock pouted a little, “You make it sound like I have never found a woman attractive or that I have never had sexual intercourse.” He pointed at his stomach. “I have proof.”

John ran a hand over his face, “Sherlock you could have slept with Irene ten million times but you didn’t. She called you the Virgin!”

Sherlock’s face turned from a pout to a look of frustration. “I like sex and have always liked sex.”

“Coulda fooled me.” John mumbled looking down at his sock covered feet.

“What does that mean?”

John shook his head, “Never mind.”

Sherlock shook his head this time. “No…what did you mean.”

John sighed, “Sherlock we have sex like once a month, quite frankly I am unsure how you got pregnant in the first place.”

“Chinchilla guy.”

“Oh so it takes some hot ass guy to get your blood boiling enough to have sex with your boyfriend.” John said now actually pushing off Sherlock’s legs and getting up to pace the room. “That REALLY says a lot for our relationship, Sherlock.”

“You know that I find you attractive.”

“Do I?” John questioned with his eyebrow raised. “I’m not sure that I do because you sure as hell never tell me.”

Sherlock sighed, “I take you on dates…to the movies and dinners.”

John sighed too, “You do.”

Sherlock was silent for a minute…a very long minute in John’s mind but when he spoke up he was a bit shocked.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?”

Sherlock nodded his head, “I’m sorry for not having sex with you…all the time.”

John chuckled a little, “Sherlock I get it you don’t have to apologize.”

“But I should…shouldn’t I?”

John was hesitant at first before shrugging his shoulders. “I get how you are…I knew how you were before I agreed we were going to start our relationship.”

Sherlock nodded his head as he sat up on the couch, looking intently at John.

“What?”

“You REALLY knew how much I do not require sex before we got together?”

“Sherlock it really isn’t that big of a deal.” John said getting exasperated by the whole topic because quite frankly all the talk of sex turned HIM on.

“How could you possibly have known?”

John sighed throwing his hands up. “I just knew…”

“Well I will tell you what *I* know.” Sherlock said.

This caused John to give Sherlock an inquisitive look but didn’t say anything out loud.

Sherlock waited a second and when he realized John was staying quiet he continued. “I know that YOU desire sex and quite often.”

John rolled his eyes, “You know that now because you are my boyfriend.”

“I knew before.”

“So you say.”

“You always had a girlfriend…or boyfriend…wife”

John shook his head, “Never before you.” He said to the middle part of Sherlock’s statement not even commenting on the ‘wife’ part. That was a slightly sore subject, mostly for Mary. He hadn’t meant to hurt her by leaving the marriage 6 months into it in order to move back in…really move in…with Sherlock. They had started their ‘romantic’ relationship a month later. It was something they should have done years before but then Sherlock ‘died’ and he felt he had to move on with is life, hence the marriage. Thankfully they somehow were able to stay friends, John thought she had to be one of the most wonderfully accepting people in the world.                                        

“Right…anyway…” Sherlock cleared his throat. “You always had somebody and I don’t think…wait I KNOW you didn’t simply want the attention or shall I even say it…love…you wanted the sex.”

“Are you calling me a whore Sherlock Holmes?”

Sherlock was confused and made a face. “I would never use such an awful word.”

“Right.” John said as he was thinking. ‘But of course would never make it known that you wouldn’t saying it about ME’.

“Again I am simply saying you want sex and yet you are with me a man who like you mentioned earlier does not require sex more than once a month.” Sherlock was getting worked up it was obvious in his speech pattern.

“You are my friend and have always been my friend, even when I didn’t have friends, and then it just seemed right to become more. I mean everybody thought we were a couple anyway…”

John was a bit shocked, “You caught onto that?”

“Of course I did, I’m a detective how would I not notice that.”

“Right.”

It was then something in Sherlock’s ramblings that caught his attention. “Sherlock do you think…” He didn’t get to finish his sentence when there was a slight knock on the door and Mary poked her head into the room.

‘Speak of the devil’ John thought to himself as he smiled at his friend, slightly thankful they could pause their conversation, or so he thought.

Mary smiled at the two men. “Hey guys I was in the area and thought I would stop by.” Seeing that Sherlock was in his night clothes she felt a little weird. “But if this is a bad time I can leave.”

“Actually…”

“Perfectly fine time.” Sherlock said standing up. “Tea?”

“Sure.” She replied eyeing Sherlock as he walked into the kitchen. She then looked at John with a huge smile on her face. “How long was it going to be before you told me?”

“Excuse me?” John’s mind was still on his and Sherlock’s pervious conversation so he thought she was on that same topic somehow.

Mary laughed, “Sherlock is SO pregnant.”

John’s eyes went wide, “What? How…”

“It’s how he is walking and I just know these things.”

John was still confused, “He is not even two months along he is not walking any different than before.”

“Of course not.” Mary said laughing some more. “Greg told me.”

John cursed the inspector and glanced to the kitchen before whispering to Mary. “You can’t let him know you know. He hates that Greg knows and has threatened bodily harm if I tell anybody else.”

“Oh why not tell anybody, this is a great thing.”

“What is?” Sherlock questioned as he walked into the room with tea and what could pass off as bisects if the two men actually went to the shops on a regular basis.

“You being Pre…”

“Precious….you are just so precious.” John said and made a face at how ridiculous that sounded coming out of his mouth.

Both Mary and Sherlock looked at John like he needed to be carted off to the funny farm right that second.

“I’m what?”

“Can we forget I said that?” John asked hopefully.

Sherlock shook his head in the negative. “You said I’m precious…what in the world is THAT supposed to mean?”

John sighed and figured he would be in MORE trouble with the precious comment then he would explaining that Mary knew he was pregnant. “What I REALLY meant was that it’s a great thing that you’re pregnant.”

“JOHN!” Sherlock exclaimed and squeaked at the same time a very ‘un-Sherlock’ noise.

“It’s okay Sherlock I already knew…it’s why I stopped by actually.” Mary said smiling. “I think it’s completely wonderful.”

“Humph.”

John rolled his eyes, “He is still not so sure about the whole thing.”

“And I’m horny.”

“SHERLOCK!” It was John’s turn to exclaim. “We have company.”

Mary chuckled finding the couple completely adorable. Of course she wished SHE was still with John Watson but after 2 years she had moved on herself and found that she could get over the fact that her husband ran off with his male best friend. “Don’t be embarrassed John…my gosh for a guy who needed sex sometimes multiple times a day you were also very prudish.”

This caught Sherlock’s attention and he looked at his boyfriend with a raised eyebrow. “Is she telling the truth?”

“Why would she lie” John muttered again finding his stocking feet rather interesting.

Sherlock flopped into his chair again and steepled his hands looking pensive but to those who knew him they could tell he was upset about something.

Mary knew Sherlock enough to actually understand what was going on while John was completely confused.

“John maybe you can go down to the corner shops and buy knew biscuits these things look ghastly.” She said plucking one off the plate and looking at it in distain.

“But…”

She shook her head, “Please.”

“Right.” John grabbed his shoes and began putting them on before doing the same with his jacket. It was a nice spring day but he never knew about the London weather it could easily start pouring on his short trek down the street. “Be back then.”

Mary waved at her friend and then turned to Sherlock. “Sherlock…he’s not going to leave you.”

Sherlock moved his hands away from his face and looked at Mary, his eyes actually looking sad and full of expression. “Why should he stay?”

“Well you are having his child for starters.”

“That won’t matter.”

Mary sighed and sat down in John’s chair so she was looking straight at Sherlock. “He loves you and you love him that is obvious otherwise you wouldn’t be so upset.”

“I’m not…”

“Oh but you are.” Mary said reaching over and touching Sherlock’s knee in a friendly, comforting manner.

Sherlock sucked in a shaky breath. “I cannot give him what he needs. You said it yourself…multiple times a day.”

Mary realized what this REALLY was about. She thought it was the baby but it wasn’t just that. “You think he is going to leave you because you won’t have sex with him?”

“I do…want to.” Sherlock and when he could tell she needed more of an explanation he tried to give one. “I just don’t have the same desires he does.”

“You just stated a few minutes ago that you’re horny.” Mary said with a slight smirk on her lips.

Sherlock sighed, “It is true and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Normally I have sexual intercourse with John because I know he needs it and there are times that I do too, but THIS actual horniness is different.”

“You’re pregnant…it’s how things are supposed to be.”

“Ugh.” Sherlock grunted thinking about all the things he found completely distasteful about being pregnant.

“Sherlock you cannot compare sexual hormones with morning sickness.” Mary said as if reading his mind. “You should enjoy it while you’ve got it if you don’t normally have it.”

“It?”

Mary groaned, “The sexual urges. If you are worried you will lose John because of it then I would be using it while you have it…not that he would leave anyway.”

“I wouldn’t.”

Both Sherlock and Mary looked to the door where John was standing with a plastic sack in his hand. He walked right over to Sherlock and cupped his cheeks. “I LOVE you, you silly pregnant fool.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like always reviews and kudos are always welcome and quite frankly I thrive on them! 
> 
> Thank you for reading!!! :)


	4. Fried fish & Big Brothers

“I’m Hungry.”

John looked up from where he was typing his blog with a raised eyebrow. “Since when are you hungry?”

“Since you put your spawn in me.”

“You make it sound like I did one of your evil science experiments on your insides.” John said with a slight laugh. “Sherlock you seriously need to get used to this being pregnant thing or you’re not going to have any fun.”

Sherlock looked at John like he was speaking in tongues. “Fun?” he shook his head. “Having to use the loo every 15.67 minutes and vomiting every morning…afternoon and evening is not fun.”

“You’re only looking at the bad things.” John pointed out as he stood up. “But come on let’s go get something to eat.”

“Can’t we just call in for it?”

John shook his head, “No we’re going out so get dressed.”

It seemed like Sherlock was living in his night clothes recently so John planned on changing that. Sherlock grumbled something about comfort and pregnant people as he went upstairs.

John finished his sentence in his blog and waited for Sherlock who was taking his sweet time. “Probably doing his hair.” He said to himself.

Sherlock came downstairs and shocked John to death. “What ARE you wearing?”

Sherlock looked down at his attire and shrugged. “It’s comfortable and I hurt.”

“I never thought I would see the day when Sherlock Bloody Holmes is planning to wear sweat pants out in public.” John said with a chuckle but held his hands up in defense when Sherlock gave him a death glare.

“They are athletic pants…maybe I will visit the gym after we go eat.”

“That would be even odder.”

“Just shut up.” Sherlock grumbled as he walked out the door and downstairs.

<><><>><><> 

“We’re going to have to tell them.” John said as he took a bite of his fish. The only place he could get Sherlock to go eat was his favorite fish & chips shop even though John had wanted a hamburger. Sadly, the pregnant man won.

Sherlock raised an eyebrow, “Tell who what?”

“Everybody…that you’re pregnant of course.” John said. “People don’t take kindly to finding out about babies after months of pregnancy.

“I think I mentioned before…I’m not telling anybody. Too many people know already.” Sherlock exclaimed and tossed his fork down on the table.

John was shocked at Sherlock’s behavior but didn’t mention it, instead he stayed focused on the topic of telling their friends and family of the pregnancy. “I want to tell them.”

Sherlock was quiet for a second and looked down at his fish basket and sighed. “Who?”

“Mrs. Hudson, Mycroft…your parents.”

For some reason the last one got Sherlock to look up in horror. “Oh no…not my parents.”

“Why ever not?”

“They will have a conniption fit.”

John had to laugh a little at that, “Sherlock they know we’re a couple…have for ages now so why would having a baby be a big deal. I think your mum would be thrilled.”

Sherlock mumbled something.

“Hmm?”

“Told her I wasn’t having sex.”

“You told your mother you weren’t having sex?” John tried not to laugh but it was almost impossible to do. When Sherlock nodded his head John shook his own. “Well my friend she’s going to wonder how that little baby got inside of you.”

“Which is precisely why I cannot tell her!”

John rolled his eyes, “Sherlock you are a grown man in a committed relationship. I’m sorry but if your mother has issues with us having sex then that is her problem.”

Sherlock was a bit taken aback by John’s tone but it also made him feel loved and protected. He made a face when John said the next part.

“Not like we’re having sex anyway.”

Not wanting to get on that topic right then Sherlock changed the subject. “We can tell Mrs. Hudson tonight….get it out of the bloody way.”

John grinned from ear to ear. “Wonderful!”

<><><><><><>  


The plan was to talk to Mrs. Hudson but once they got back to the flat Sherlock noticed something right away. “Fuck.” He uncharacteristically cursed.

John’s eyes were wide, “Whoa what is it?”

“Mycroft.”

John looked in Sherlock’s direction and noticed the straightened door knocker and sighed. “Well guess we’re telling him first.”

“God help us all.” Sherlock groaned as they walked into the building and up the stairs to the flat. Sure enough there was Mycroft sitting on the couch and flipping through the pages of a book…a pregnancy book.

“When did you get that?” John questioned his boyfriend.

Sherlock looked at his brother, his brother looked at him and Mycroft was the first to speak up

“This is a fascinating book.”

“Mycroft…”

The older Holmes shook his head, “No need to tell me. It is all here in this book and written all over your face.”

Sherlock sighed and flopped into his chair. “You will not tell Mother and Father.”

Mycroft put the book down and looked over at his brother. “Wouldn’t think of it…but shall I recommend that YOU tell them? Mother would be delighted.”

“He seems to think she will be upset with him…with us.” John spoke up as he carried tea into the room. He wasn’t sure if Sherlock would want it but Mycroft always drank tea when he came by.

“She may…but also delighted.” Mycroft stated as he took the cup offered to him and settled back against the couch cushions even more.

Sherlock ‘humphed’ when he realized his brother wouldn’t be leaving as soon as he would have liked. “You remember how Mother took it when you told her you were pregnant.”

John had taken a sip of his tea and now it was being sprayed all over the sitting room floor. “What?”

Mycroft actually bushed and glared at Sherlock at the same time. “We don’t mention THAT.”

Sherlock looked at John and despite his brother’s words he explained what he was talking about. “Mycroft got himself pregnant while away at an equine camp in Scotland when he was…” he glanced at Mycroft. “How old?”

“Sixteen.” Mycroft muttered.

“What happened…I mean…”

“I miscarried.”

John all of a sudden felt very sad for Mycroft. Even now, years later, he had a feeling the experience still hurt the older man. He looked at Sherlock. “Babe I don’t think his experience has anything to do with ours. Your mother was sure to have been upset when finding out her teenager was pregnant.”

“He is right.” Mycroft said also looking at Sherlock. “I do believe she will be very excited but also wondering when the wedding will take place.” He said the last part with a smirk.

Both John and Sherlock looked at each other than at the older man. “Wedding?”

Mycroft nodded, “Oh yes. If her baby boy is going to be having sexual intercourse than there better be a wedding.”

“See I told you she cared if I had sex or not.” Sherlock exclaimed as he bounced up and started pacing. “But there cannot be a wedding.”

“Why not?” John asked causing both men to look at him like crazy. “Seriously…why bloody not?”

“Because I don’t want one.” Sherlock stated

John pouted a little, “Okay we will talk about THAT later.”

Mycroft found the whole thing rather amusing but realized the time and stood up. “I must leave, but I will keep on you to talk with Mother and Father.” With that he sat his teacup on the coffee table and headed out of the flat.

<><><><><><> “I’ve had enough for one day.” Sherlock practically whined from where he was lying on the couch looking up at the ceiling. “Tomorrow?”

John shook his head in the negative, “You said today so today it will be.”

They were arguing about continuing their conversations with friends and family. They still had yet to talk to Mrs. Hudson since Mycroft had made an appearance. John wanted to get her ‘over with’ so they could focus on Mrs. And Mrs. Holmes. That of course was still something Sherlock was completely against.

“Come on Sherlock we need to do this.”

“I’m sleeping.”

John rolled his eyes, “You are not.”

Sherlock sighed, “Fine let’s go.”

The two of them headed down the stairs to Mrs. Hudson’s door and gave it a knock.

The elderly woman came to the door and was shocked to see the two smiling men. John actually smiling a true smile and Sherlock an awkward one but a smile non-the-less. “John…Sherlock, normally I come to YOUR flat.” She said as she moved out of the way so they could come inside.

“Well we have something to tell you.” John began before she started squealing.

“Oh my goodness you’re getting married this is so wonderful!” Mrs. Hudson exclaimed practically bouncing in place, not realizing she was congratulating them for the wrong thing.

“Oh bloody no.” Sherlock said shaking his head, “What John is TRYING to tell you is that we’re having a baby…I’m pregnant.”

This time Mrs. Hudson stopped bouncing and looked at Sherlock like he had lost his mind. “Excuse me?”

Sherlock looked to John, “Why is this so hard for people to understand?” he looked to their landlord and tried again. “There is a small person growing inside of me, I am going to have a baby.”

“Oh Sherlock.” Mrs. Hudson walked over and gave him a gentle hug like he was going to break if she did any harder. “Congratulations.”

John smiled big as he watched the interaction and thought he even saw a small smile on his partners face. Now if only to get him to turn around on talking to his parents and the wedding idea.

 


	5. Parents & Others

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys it's been so long since I updated this story! I hope you enjoy!

“This is an absolutely ridiculous idea.” Sherlock said as they got out of the car in front of his parent’s house. He stood by the front gate staring at the house with pure misery on his face.

John laughed out loud at the look on his boyfriend’s face. “You are NOT going to die, Sherlock.”

“I think I may…and then what will happen to our child?”

“Die too obviously.” John said just be honest and trying to get a reaction out of Sherlock which he did.

Sherlock had a look of horror on his face at John’s words. “John Watson!”

“You asked.”

“It was rhetorical!”

“Oh…oops.” John laughed again still thinking the looks his boyfriend was giving him were hilarious. “Come on we have parents to surprise.”

Sherlock groaned but walked with John to the front door of the cottage and knocked.

Mrs. Holmes answered the door and squealed in delight to see her youngest son standing at the entry to her home. “Oh Sherlock it’s so good to see you!”

Sherlock grunted when his mum grabbed ahold of him and hugged him so tightly he was sure he would go into labor right then. Of course he was NOWHERE near time for that sort of thing but he was being overdramatic like always. “Mum stop.” He said after close to 2.56 minutes of cuddling.

John stepped up ready for his hug that thankfully came because Sherlock actually looked like he was in the need of air. His hug from Mrs. Holmes was much shorter but John knew she cared for him.

Mr. Holmes came to the door and looked surprised to see Sherlock and John. “Sherlock, son this is a surprise.” He said and then ushered them inside since Mrs. Holmes had yet to do so and they had been standing on the stoop.

Once inside everybody quickly got a cup of tea and sat in the sitting room to drink it. It was Mr. Holmes that realized something wasn’t quite right with his son. “Are you back on the drugs?” he questioned bluntly.

Sherlock put his teacup down on the table next to him and looked at his father calmly. “What kind of a question is that?”

“A good one.” Mr. Holmes stated glancing at his son’s bouncing leg and slightly shaky hands.

John looked at the two Holmes men, wondering what Sherlock would say. He did NOT expect what he did say though.

“I take pre-natal vitamins now days father.”

It only took two seconds for Mrs. Holmes to be at her son’s side and once again catching him in an epic hug. “Oh my gosh!” she exclaimed loudly causing Sherlock to wince.

John smiled big, this was the reaction he was hoping for. Mr. Holmes walked over and patted John on the back. “Good job.” He said and smirked.

John blushed bright red.

 

<><><><><><>

 

“I have been cuddled to death.” Sherlock stated. “Utterly to death.”

“You are such a drama queen.” John said as they got into the cab that pulled up for them. They had spent a good few hours with Sherlock’s parents and now it was time to go back to Baker Street. Even though he loved Sherlock’s parents he was thankful to be heading back home where he could be alone with the man he loved.

“I think we should go to the police station. I need to talk with George about a case.”

John rolled his eyes, “First off his name is GREG and secondly we don’t have a case.”

“Precisely.”

At first John had no idea what Sherlock was talking about and then got it. “Maybe you should really start taking a break from cases…” he said gently but by the look on Sherlock’s face he knew he made the wrong choice, especially sitting in a cab neither of them being able to run if things got heated…and not in a good way.

“I’m just now three months pregnant.” Sherlock exclaimed, his emotions getting the best of him. He subconsciously glanced down at his still flat stomach.

“You’re also very sick most days and I worry about you.” John said softly, not matching Sherlock’s exclamation.

Sherlock turned to look at John and sighed. “I need cases John.”

It was John’s turn to sigh, “I know you do…but I cannot have you gallivanting all around London and carrying my child at the same time.”

“I’m not aborting this baby but I am not stopping cases for at least another few months.”

John wasn’t happy about it but he knew he would not win this fight. “Fine.” He stated and turned to look out the window.

When they arrived at police headquarters Greg was just about as pleased as John to hear that Sherlock was there for a case. “You’re bloody pregnant.” He hissed quietly so nobody else could hear. He wasn’t sure who Sherlock told but figured out the other detectives did not.

“I know that.”

Greg ran a hand through his hair. “I do have a case but it won’t be pretty and you probably won’t like it.” he said pointing at John when saying who wouldn’t like it.

Sherlock didn’t care he was giddy as they all walked to the conference room to talk about the case with the other officers.

 

<><><><><><> 

“We are NOT going there again.” John said shaking his head like crazy. “Last time was bloody awful and…”

“Rabbits.” Sherlock said a huge smile on his face. “I like rabbits.”

Everybody looked at Sherlock like he had completely lost his mind. It was John who spoke up again. “We are NOT going to Baskerville, there are too many things that could lead to contamination and problems with the pregnancy and baby.” He said this forgetting that Donovan and Anderson were also in the room.

“Pregnancy?”

“Baby?”

Sherlock looked at John with a death glare.

“Shit.” John cursed looking at the two detectives. “Forget I said that?”

“No way” Donovan said shaking her head.

“I didn’t even think you had sex.” Anderson said stupidly looking at Sherlock.

John rolled his eyes, “Of course we have sex.” He prayed that his boyfriend did not reach for one of the detective’s guns and use it on him right then and there.

Sherlock was NOT happy with this situation at all. His response to it was to storm out of the conference room and down the hall to the bathrooms. He was so upset he didn’t realize he went into the woman’s toilet.

After about two minutes Donovan joined him at the sinks and leaned back against the counter. “It’s a good thing ya know.”

“Huh?”

“Being pregnant, you’re lucky.”

Sherlock turned to look at her and hoped she couldn’t see the tears welling up in his eyes. “I feel completely out of control. That is NOT lucky.”

“Do you love John?”

“That’s a dumb question.”

Donovan shrugged, “Not really…so answer it.”

“Of course I do.” Sherlock said and meant it with all his heart.

“Then be happy about this because HE is.” With that she left the bathroom leaving him alone for another few minutes. He then left with a sigh and actually ran into his boyfriend walking down the hall.

“Are you ready to leave? If we’re going to get to Baskerville by dark we need to leave.” John said still not sounding thrilled but felt like he owned it to Sherlock to go since he had spilled their news all over the station.

Sherlock was shocked were they really going to go? “Really?” he tried to hide his excitement but it was bubbling to the top.

John smiled a little seeing Sherlock excited about something was always fun. “Yeah…Greg is coming with us so we need to get home and pack before he comes to pick us up.”

Sherlock almost bounded out of the police station and out to the curb to hail a cab. On their way home he did something almost unheard of…for Sherlock anyway.

They were heading in the direction of Baker Street, John looking out the window and Sherlock seemed to be doing the same thing when all of a sudden there was a hand in John’s lap, squeezing. John couldn’t help the squeak that escaped his lips. “Sherlock!”

“Hmm?” Sherlock said playing dumb as he started to move his hand up to unbutton John’s jeans.

“We’re in a bloody cab!”

Sherlock looked at John and smirked. “So?”

“Nice people don’t do this kind of thing in cabs and I like to think we’re that sort of people.” As John said this his voice was getting deeper and huskier because Sherlock was still messing with the button and the zip on his jeans.

“I want to make you happy. You just made ME really happy.”

“I don’t need a hand-job in the back of a taxi cab to feel happy, Sherlock.” John pointed out and realized if he didn’t want this then he could just pull his hand away and they could finish off their ride in peace. BUT being a man…and a man with needs he did NOT stop his boyfriend but let him fully undo his jeans and reach inside, stroking him.

“You’re hard.” Sherlock whispered point blank.

John rolled his now dilated eyes. “No shit Sherlock.” He whispered back

Sherlock smirked as he continued his stroking, it was a bit hard to do with John still wearing all of his clothes but they couldn’t do anything about the cab.

“Fuck…” John hissed his head falling back against the seat.

“I wish.” Sherlock said smirking some more. He was about to say something else when his cell phone started ringing in his coat pocket. “Lovely.” He said removing his hand and going to answer the phone. “hello?”

John sat up his eyes wide, was Sherlock really going to talk on the phone rather than continue to jerk him off? Oh this was so not good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty please review and send kudos...me loves some feedback :)


	6. Onion Rings & Blackberry Pie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well just because I am really nice I decided to update another chapter of this story today. I totally apologize for the STUPID case that I came up with but my mind is awful when it comes to that sort of thing. Also this story is supposed to be silly so it fits...I guess...ANYWAY enjoy!!!
> 
> P.S. Thank you for the reviews & Kudos!

John was horny beyond belief the whole ride home while Sherlock talked on the phone to Lestrade and he knew he would be for a long time because when they got back to 221B they would have to pack for their impromptu trip to Baskerville for their case…something he still didn’t quite understand. From the sound of it Greg was talking with Sherlock about said case but hearing the one sided conversation wasn’t clarifying anything for the doctor. He figured Sherlock would probably fill him in on the nitty gritty parts of the case once they got home.

As they pulled up to 221B John paid the cabbie and walked with Sherlock up the stairs and into their flat. At this point Sherlock had ended his call with the Detective Inspector and was heading straight for the bedroom to pack.

“Are you going to explain what we’re expected to do exactly?” John questioned his boyfriend as they both entered the bedroom and got suitcases from their hiding place under the bed

“Chickens.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said Chickens.” Sherlock said as he started putting clothing into his suitcase.

John sighed shaking his head, “Another ANIMAL case? First it was a chinchilla, then a cat…”

Sherlock glared at John, “Yes and a cow and now a chicken…I get it.”

“Well don’t you find it a bit odd that Lestrade would be sending us on animal related cases all the time?”

“We know Baskerville.”

John had to admit that was true, “Well as long as it’s not a bloody gigantic hound I am okay.” He then made a face. “It’s not a gigantic chicken is it?”

“Furry.”

“Pardon?”

“Furry chickens.”

John had to laugh out loud at the image that came into his head. “So we’re going to investigate why chickens are growing fur?”

“Basically.”

“It IS a research facility who knows what the heck they are up to.” John pointed out as he finished filling his suitcase and placed it on the floor once he zipped it.

Sherlock also finished with his packing and sat his suitcase next to John’s before heading for the bathroom. “We are supposed to help figure out if they are doing anything illegal and if so help them finally get shut down.” He explained.

John was a bit surprised at this but nodded his head as he leaned in the doorway of the bathroom while Sherlock used the toilet. “You’ve gotten less modest.” He said just as a statement.

“What?”

“You never used to leave the door open when you used the toilet.” John explained.

Sherlock finished his business and flushed the toilet before going to wash his hands. “I figure you’ve seen it before you might as well not mind seeing it now.”

John chuckled. “There is a difference between seeing a man’s penis taking a piss than during sex.”

“Okay.” Sherlock simply said before heading out of the bathroom and then out of the bedroom with his suitcase in tow. He sat it down in the sitting room and then sat down himself to wait for Lestrade to pick them up.

“You okay?” John questioned as he sat down next to Sherlock on the couch.

Sherlock nodded his head, “Just a headache.” He actually admitted.

John sighed knowing he shouldn’t offer Sherlock anything for the ache because of his pregnancy. “Maybe you’re hungry…or dehydrated.”

“Maybe.” Sherlock said finding himself not as excited about this case as he thought he would be…as he should be. “I haven’t eaten anything since my parent’s house.”

“Me neither,” John said as he got up and headed for the kitchen to see if they had anything that was eatable. He found things to make a sandwich and went about making things for the both of them. He knew Sherlock liked turkey cold cuts while he liked ham so he made sure to hand Sherlock the right sandwich. “Here go.”

Sherlock took the plate and started eating right away to John’s surprise.

Halfway through their small meal the door buzzed and John went to get it. Sure enough it was Greg there to pick them up.

“Can I sit up front?” Sherlock asked as they got their belongings and headed downstairs. Of course Sherlock got upset over the fact that both the other men insisted on carrying his suitcase down the stairs.

“Sure Sherlock.”

So that is what happened Sherlock sat up front with Greg while John sat in the back all the way to Baskerville. They talked about how they would check into the town inn and worry about investigating anything the next day since it would be after 8pm when they arrived at the country town.

Once there the men carried their bags into the inn and got their room reservations sorted. Of course this time around Sherlock and John were sharing a room while Greg had his own across the hall. They agreed to meet downstairs for a late dinner after getting settled into their rooms.

To John’s surprise Sherlock flopped onto the bed with a tired sigh once they were in their room. “You okay?” he asked for the second time that evening. “Do you still have a headache?”

Sherlock shook his head in the negative, “No…just tired.” He admitted.

“I understand,” John said as he put their suit cases by an arm chair and then went to look out the window. They had a great view of the countryside and part of him thought about how this would make for a great Honeymoon spot….well besides the at least partly corrupt government facility in the distance….oh and the fact that Sherlock insisted they were never getting married.

“You’re thinking too hard.”

John turned quickly when he heard Sherlock’s voice standing right next to him. “What?”

“I can tell when you’re thinking about something.”

“Yeah well most people can tell that about another person.” John said as placed his hands on Sherlock’s hips, really wanting…no needing a kiss.

Sherlock knew what John was thinking and gave a small smile. “You can kiss me.”

“Thank you for the permission.” John breathed as he leaned in and pressed his lips gently against the younger man’s.

The kiss stayed chaste and loving but lasted a good few minutes before the two pulled back with equal smiles on their faces.

“I love you.” John whispered.

Sherlock smiled a bit more. “I know you do…I love you as well.”

 

________________

 

“Sherlock you need more than that…”

“I want this John.”

John took a deep breath and let it out his nose. “Sherlock you are NOT eating ice cream and blackberry pie for dinner.”

“It’s chocolate John!”

“What?”

“The ice cream.”

“The type doesn’t matter…you need a proper meal.” John was trying to convince the pregnant man that he wanted more than just dessert for dinner that evening. Greg was looking on in amusement.

Sherlock glared, “You wanted me to eat something, right? Well this is what I want to eat.”

“John you might want to let him have what he wants.” Greg said speaking up from behind his menu, ready to get smacked if that was to come next. Thankfully it didn’t.

John did glare at the Detective Inspector but mostly focused on Sherlock. “You can have the desserts if you eat some REAL food item too.”

“But that is too much food.”

“Well…”

Just than their waitress came to the table and John ordered a steak, baked potato and side salad. Greg ordered some pasta dish also with a side salad and Sherlock to nobodies surprise ordered onion rings, blackberry pie and chocolate ice cream. Stating he wanted everything at the same time.

“Christ Sherlock…your stomach is going to be hurting like none other tonight.” John scolded when he heard the younger man’s order.

Sherlock just glared.

 

___________

 

“I told you, you would feel ill.” John said as he and Sherlock lay on the bed in their room, John’s hand lovingly rubbing the consulting detective’s stomach. He winced a little when it could even feel it gurgle under his hand.

Sherlock whimpered as he tried to ignore the cramping in his stomach. “I blame your child.’

“Oh it’s mine only?”

Sherlock simply nodded his head.

John chuckled and reached down to pull the covers up over them. “Try and get some sleep Baby…we’ve got a busy day tomorrow.”

“Today.”

“Huh?”

“It’s after twelve…so therefore it is today that we have a busy day.” Sherlock explained as he turned and rested his head on John’s chest, something he never really did.

John accepted the invitation to cuddle and wrapped his arm around Sherlock. “Okay even more of a reason to get to sleep.”

“Okay John.”

“Okay Sherlock.”

“Goodnight.”

“G’night.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think through reviews and kudos!

**Author's Note:**

> I hope everybody liked this. If you want there to be more please send reviews! :)


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